5 signs you may be an undiagnosed autistic woman

Many girls, women, and those assigned female at birth (afab) are diagnosed much later in life than their male peers. While this is slowly starting to change, many healthcare professionals — including therapists, psychologists, psychiatrists, doctors, nurses, social workers, and so on — are not well-trained to recognize less obvious presentations of autism.

Once called high-functioning autism or Asperger syndrome, “level one” or “mild” autism can be particularly difficult to diagnose — unless you know what to look for.

Identifying with any or all of the following does not necessarily mean that you are autistic. Autism is a genetic neurodevelopmental difference, meaning that you are born with it. You cannot “catch” autism or develop it later in life. If you are autistic, you would have had signs of autism as a baby and young child.

Here are 5 signs that you might be on the spectrum:

1) You were labelled as “Highly Sensitive”

Elaine Aron coined the term “Highly Sensitive Person” or HSP to describe someone with a unique cluster of emotional, physical, and sensory sensitivities. Her description has led many to wonder about the similarities between HSPs and those who are autistic.

People who exhibit the Highly Sensitive Person trait:

  • Are easily overwhelmed by sensory stimuli (bright lights, rough fabrics, loud sounds, etc.),
  • Are highly affected by the moods of others,
  • Experience very strong emotions (both positive and negative) and have a rich emotional life,
  • Are highly conscientious and detail-oriented,
  • Have a difficult time coping with change,
  • Love to learn for the sake of learning,
  • Require a lot of time alone in order to recharge,
  • Get sick easily (especially when a lot is going on in life or after travel), take a long time to heal or “reset” after a traumatic or upsetting event,
  • Dislike small talk but can pretend to like it when “necessary”,
  • Can exhibit startlingly intense focus on subjects and tasks that they love (i.e., special interests), and so on.

Aron, who also identifies as a “Highly Sensitive Person,” is very likely describing a large group of characteristics of autistic people, and specifically autistic people with so-called “mild” or “level one” autism.

(Aron was emailed for this article about HSP and autism, but never responded. Her avoidance of the autism community and unwillingness to properly address questions about HSP and autism is unfortunate, since her work could help destigmatize autism and challenge the deficit model of autism. She presents the HSP trait as being a great yet challenging gift.)

2) You prefer a lot of time alone or with only one person at a time

Autistic women and girls were typically labelled loners in childhood. They may have shown major interest in and love for people starting early in life, but could only take being in the presence of others in small doses.

This is not because autistic people hate or dislike others. Being around several people can be overwhelming both sensorily and cognitively for an autistic person, so they need a lot of time alone to recharge and pursue their special interests. People who are not autistic are usually not as interested in certain topics to the same extent and may even tease or bully the autistic person because of their deep curiosity and interests.

Autistic people often experience bullying or cruel teasing starting early in life, so they learned that it was easier and more calming to spend time away from others. This often gives others the perception that the autistic person is shy or introverted or strange. While many autistic people do identify as being introverted, some autistic people are actually extroverted, love to talk, and are energized from being around others.

Autistic people DO have friends and create STRONG BONDS with their loved ones. Some autistic people experience friendships and relationships more intensely than non-autistic people.

Most autistic people are fine being alone for long periods, and when they are with friends the discussion tends to be complex and deep (often philosophical in nature, examining the “big” questions). And when discussion is not the focus, autistic folks love to partake in their special interests with their friends.

Conversations with more than one or two other people can be overwhelming for autistic people. Their brains notice and take in more detail, and thus are more easily overwhelmed. For this reason, autistic people tend to prefer hanging out with only one or two other people.

3) You likely work in — or have special interest in — art, psychology, and/or science

Autistic females, in particular, are often very imaginative, artistic, and highly capable in the arts. This can include interest and talent in writing, painting, drawing, sculpture, singing, acting, theatre, music, and so on.

Autistic brains tend to be very detail-oriented, leading to a tendency to be very good at science and analytical thinking. Whether or not an autistic person ends up in the sciences (and especially a career in science) largely depends on their upbringing and influences. Those who had the advantage of receiving good education and had the resources to attend post-secondary school often excel in academia.

One common area of interest for many autistic females is in psychology. Since they grew up feeling different from everyone else, they often look to psychology for answers — often reading self-help books and psychology texts long before their peers. For many, this leads to independent study and the development of a special interest in psychology.

Several choose careers that are related to psychology in some way, either as researchers, psychologists, therapists, school counsellors, or social workers.

While autistic people can be interested in a diverse range of career fields, they are over-represented in the arts, sciences, technology, and in psychology. Their traits and strengths may be especially well-suited for academia, and many find themselves to be lifelong learners — interested in pursuing formal and/or informal educational opportunities throughout life.

4) You have probably been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, PTSD, BPD, or similar

Late-diagnosed autistic females are often first diagnosed — or misdiagnosed — with anxiety, depression, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), borderline personality disorder (BPD), bipolar disorder, obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), eating disorders, and/or phobias.

Even after significant amounts of therapy and receiving these kinds of diagnoses, the undiagnosed autistic person often feels that something is still missing. They may keep jumping from one therapist to the next, but without showing significant improvement or increased satisfaction with life. Suicide ideation and suicide attempts are very common in the female autistic population.

Unfortunately, many healthcare professionals — including therapists and those who specialize in autism assessments — do not receive enough education or training to be able to identify more “mild” presentations of autism. For this reason, autistic women are usually not diagnosed until adulthood. Their difficulty with fitting in, lack of answers, and lack of understanding from others often leads to the development of mental health concerns.

While these diagnoses may be correct and can overlap with autism, they are all too often incorrect or partial. They do not represent the full scope of what the individual is going through.

5) You have a high chance of having allergies, autoimmune disorders, fibromyalgia, and/or connective tissue disorders

For many women and girls, an autism diagnosis is preceded by a long history of health issues. Many have digestive problems, connective tissue disorders like Ehlers Danlos syndrome (hypermobile type), food and environmental allergies, and autoimmune disorders.

Many late diagnosed autistic individuals were diagnosed as having irritable bowel syndrome (IBS) or fibromyalgia on account of having frequent gastrointestinal issues and chronic pain, respectively.

A recent study found that autistic people have a much higher rate of the most common autoimmune disorders, with psoriasis appearing far more often in autistic people than in non-autistic people.

I think I might be autistic. What now?

If you think you might be autistic, find a psychologist in your area who specializes in autism diagnosis. If you are female, assigned female at birth, or identify as female, be sure to find a psychologist who has significant training and experience in diagnosing autism in females, women, and girls.


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11 responses to “5 signs you may be an undiagnosed autistic woman”

  1. Seema Avatar
    Seema

    Your site has been incredibly helpful, thank you

    Like

  2. Elizabeth Avatar
    Elizabeth

    I was diagnosed 10 years ago, but there is very little support for late-diagnosis..especially ladies. Thanks for being here!!!

    Like

  3. Elizabeth Avatar
    Elizabeth

    Finding an experienced doctor with extensive experience in diagnosing females is like fining a three-tailed albino unicorn. Just sayin’…

    Like

    1. Kristen Hovet Avatar
      Kristen Hovet

      I have read this article and several like it. These authors clearly do not understand the different presentations of autism and are still basing their commentary on older concepts of autism. Elaine Aron does the same. I’m autistic and I find socializing highly rewarding. This is one of many examples that go directly against what these folks are saying about highly sensitive people.

      Like

  4. Joanna Avatar
    Joanna

    Thank you for your article. As the mother of a newly diagnosed 22 year old, I am very grateful to you for your insights. They are helping to turn the lights on in our family.

    Like

  5. Kerilyn Avatar
    Kerilyn

    Brilliant thanks

    Like

  6. Kerilyn Avatar
    Kerilyn

    Brilliant article so helpful and comforting to find a fit.thankyou thankyou thankyou

    Like

  7. International Women’s Day, Autism, and Gender Diversity – The Laurier Institution

    […] or be interpreted completely differently. For example, AFAB autistic people commonly have special interests in the arts or psychology; because these are not the typical special interests of assigned male at birth (AMAB) autistic […]

    Like

  8. rucy exhales Avatar
    rucy exhales

    I totally have the first three. Like, VERY. The last two I don’t have at all, so that’s kind of confusing. But still, thank you for this post ❤

    Like

  9. Danielle Guldin Avatar
    Danielle Guldin

    This is the best article about the female autism phenotype I’ve read yet. It’s incredibly validating and makes me feel much less alone. Thank you!

    Like

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